Ok, so I promised this note a few days ago. I have never dated a younger guy until after my divorce (almost 2 years ago). The youngest guy I had dated up to that point was actually 12 days older than me. Does anyone remember Nick Hilleary? Ok, stop. Let's carry on.
I have gone out with a few guys in the past 6-7 months that were younger than I was. I know I've had some life experiences that have made me smarter and wiser than most but come on, really? These age differences are merely 3-4 years, not 10+. Isn't there a point in adulthood where age really doesn't matter? I know I have several dear girl friends and our age differences don't matter at all.
To save time, because trust me, this one guy in particular isn't worth the time I'm spending on this note/blog...I will paraphrase.
If I travel to Houston to see you, don't assume I'm spending the night. And I have no desire for black satin sheets with gold trim even if I did stay the night. At 28 years old, I just think a guy who is "ready to find the right girl and take life seriously" should know a few things about impressing a lady....first of all, the shot glass collection next to the lava lamp in your room.....they need to go. You don't have to get rid of them but let's save them in a box somewhere and we'll bust them out at a barbeque in the summer or something...or we'll teach the boys how to juggle with them. Yes, I said lava lamp...purple and orange...and I'm all for keeping things "old school" but that's like an old Pac Man game or something...not the ENTIRE collection of VHS ever made....and if you have to take 20 minutes to clear your entire internet history/cache just so I can log into class and post a discussion real quick, there might be issues in our future....I mean really.
If you want to cook for me, fine, fabulous, great, but I'm not worth a lot of effort given my reduced stomach capacity. And furthermore, me + food network = besties. Just know that I'm fine with Whataburger at 11pm if it means you are about to take some chicken leg quarters you got on sale and "have to cook before they go bad" or if you have to ask me, "do these smell okay?" before you put them in a skillet, there are probably better options. Sweetie, don't add the package gravy mix to the raw chicken in the skillet. Oh and this is like date #3-ish (first without mutual friends/family).....we're still in the impress stage!!!! Asking me to help you cook (when, honestly, I can't tell wtf you're doing and am not sure its cooking anyway) and then telling me how to make instant mashed potatoes, isn't making me like you more. Thank God, I brought my own bottle of wine.
Oh and those playlists you have playing in your room, those titled "For the Ladies #1" and "They want more" need some tweeking. I will say , "Sure Thing"..was okay but that's because I have a lame gene and happen to like Kenny G but wouldn't say he's your golden ticket to those satin sheets.
Rewind to earlier in the day when we were shopping, I think it's great that you were trying to help me finish up my shopping for my boys knowing I don't have many kid-free weekends but when we walk into Toys R Us and you have to ask me, "Why are there kids screaming in here?".....we should probably go home....or you should...then 3 times, asking me for Excedrin because its on your nerves, just know that I will never let you around my kids...especially Kasyn.
And for some reason, that thumb ring you wear, really bothers me. But not as much as the drunk text you sent me New Year's Eve that I can't even repeat on here. That has got to be one of the most degrading, disgusting texts I have ever received...and trust me, I receive them often. And when I tell you this, you laugh rather than apologize? When I said, "Perhaps we aren't compatible. I wish you the best." And you come back with, "Whatever, I have time, money, and a career"......uh huh. Is this where I was supposed to engage in the "one-up" game?
And for the record, yes, it was very weird to ask the 10 year old boy to take a picture of us at the ice skating rink and then use it as your fb profile the second I left town. Weird-o
And dating older wasn't all that great either. The older guy I dated was like 8 years older and a complete ass. I'm not saying age defines the general species or gender....I'm saying I haven't had luck with the few that I've dated younger or older.
But yay for entertaining stories to share with my single friends who should be cautious and my married friends who should be grateful they aren't missing out on anything.
I really want to attach the picture from the skating rink but I'm going to have to save that for the blog. I've already had to block this from a few people. :-D
This was originally from an event back in December but posted to fb Jan. 20, 2011.
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